Danny's Football Bluff

February 6, 2012

February 6th 2012

Manchester United and Chelsea played out a classic 3-3 draw at Stamford bridge overnight. The Blues took a 3-0 lead just after half time, with Fernando Torres playing the unlikely role of competent footballer. However United were awarded two penalties, one fair, one harsh, and it seemed inevitable when they equalised with five minutes to go.

There are some relieved members of the London Police Force today after traditional rivals West Ham United and Millwall played out a relatively peaceful match. In 2009 fans clashed outside the stadium injuring 20 people. These fiery scenes were successfully avoided by only allowing a small number of Millwall fans to attend the match. Those lucky enough to get tickets had to stay inside a special cardboard fort and could only make noise when they were holding the ‘talking stick’.

Melbourne Victory and Heart played the final derby of the season to finally decide whose season was the bigger disappointment. Somehow they both lost.

Australia’s chances of playing football at this year’s Olympics took a dive with a 2-0 qualifying loss to Uzbekistan. The Olyroos struggled in the -12 degree conditions despite manager Aurelio Vidmar doing everything he could for the squad including hiring a personal chef for the trip. The downfall of this strategy was the that chef had been told to prepare the team for London cuisine so every meal was prawn sandwiches, curry chips and a side order of deep fried sadness.

Scottish Football could be about to be turned on its head with Glasgow Rangers on the brink of liquidation. In a nutshell – Rangers owner Craig Whyte has borrowed against the income of the next four years worth of seasons tickets meaning the club will have very limited income in the next few years. Combine this with a court case regarding an alleged tax scam which could cost the club over 50 million pounds, and things are bleak for the blue half of Glasgow. To add to their woes, Rangers were knocked out of the Scottish Cup by Dundee United last night. [There’s no joke here, I’m a Celtic fan so this is just a bit of schadenfreude I’m afraid.]

Goals of the week –
You may have seen this one on Fox Sports FC but reader Jeremy Dooley spotted it first!

here’s another one in case you already saw the previous one

November 28, 2011

November 28th, 2011

This week’s Football Bluff comes to you with a bit of a sore head. In the interests of transparency I should admit I am a Melbourne Victory fan, and in Europe my team is Celtic. This weekend I saw Victory win their first home match of the year (including Harry Kewell score his first goal), and combined with Celtic’s 5-0 demolition of St Mirren and Kilmarnock upsetting Rangers, there were a few beers had last night! However – onto the Bluff!

Interesting weekend in the EPL with six of the top eight teams dropping points. Alex Ferguson took his 1-1 draw with Newcastle in typical good grace, “It was an absolute travesty! I don’t think anyone in the ground apart from the assistant thought it was a penalty, but he then let the linesman overrule him! The problem is assistant referees are not full time, even if referees are. I could not understand the decision at all. It was a terrible decision, two years ago a decision like that cost us the league…” At this point the media backed away slowly and avoided eye contact. It is presumed that Ferguson is still on this tirade, Manchester United hopes he will have stopped in time for Wednesday’s Carling Cup clash with Crystal Palace.

American Samoa, the lowest ranked of the 204 members of FIFA, have won their first ever match defeating Tonga 2-1. This brings the Polynesian team’s goal difference in all matches to a much more respectable minus 272.

The Olyroos hopes of qualifying for London 2012 took a hit when they were held to a scoreless draw by Uzbekistan. Manager Aurelio Vidmar blamed a lack of finesse in front of goal, however the fact that the players were constantly stopping play to ask “No really, is soccer actually part of the Olympics now?” was more of a factor.

English/Nigerian winger Sone Aluko has broken new ground in the world of transfers. Aluko completed his transfer from Aberdeen to Rangers by paying his own transfer fee! The 22 year old forked out 150,000 pounds from his own pocket to help him make his dream move. In light of this cash-strapped Portsmouth have signed Bill Gates, Mark Zuckerberg and the Sultan of Brunei on the off chance they will make similar moves.

Goal of the week goes to Real Sociedad defender Inigo Martinez. Who has scored an amazing injury time winner from the half way line!

This is even more incredible due to the fact that this is the second time he’s done it this season! Martinez is famous in Spain for these sort of arsey goals, sadly the only time he’s done it at international level, he did it into his own goal!

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